forgiveness, joy, new habits, pleasure, self-acceptance, self-growth

Practicing Self-Acceptance To Become Your Most Beautiful Self

July 12, 2022

By alexaphelece

How do we stop judging ourselves and accept who we are?

An excerpt from my 17 year old self:

“It is easy for me to accept who I am now because of all the years I tried to deny it. I used to want to be like everyone else, be cool, hangout with the popular kids, like what everyone else liked but it was hard. I now just accept my wild self. Many people think I am nuts half of the time because I say what I feel and do what works for me.“

Good things rarely come easy.

The concept of self-acceptance is able to be understood. But it isn’t easy to do. Accepting ourselves as we become aware of ourselves can actually be a very emotional process. As we learn through life, good things rarely come easy. The work we put in now, like an artist’s practice, will become “muscle memory” for our future self. What I mean is acceptance is a conscious decision and it happens overtime. Self-Acceptance is a step in learning to love ourselves, inside and out. It is about letting go of the things we cannot change and appreciating what makes us unique. Self-acceptance is essential for our mental and emotional well-being. It is also essential if we would like to become the most beautiful version of ourselves. Self-acceptance is a wonderful place to start.

An excerpt from my book in progress: “Posting with Purpose”

“Feelings of worthlessness often led me to feel undeserving of love or unworthy of love and that is why I started my non-profit Every Body Deserves Love (EBDL). I started EBDL because I wanted to create a space where everyone could feel loved and accepted. I hoped that I could unite like-minded individuals whose only goals were to uplift, support and help each other on their journeys to accepting and loving themselves. All I wanted was a place to scream to anyone who would listen that “you are worthy! You have to believe in yourself.” The important thing is to do what you love and not compare yourself to anyone else but accept the layers of who you are and what makes you happy. There is peace and power in that acceptance.“

Please take away this affirmation “I willingly accept the layers of who I am.” I know this can be incredibly difficult and sometimes we are not even aware that we are rejecting parts of ourselves. Society and the voices in our mind tell lies. I want us to get closer to connecting to our sources of energy. Know with certainty that we can be all we want to be if we are willing to accept the forever unfolding truth of who we are and we’re willing to do this important personal work.

Let’s get into how to stop judging ourselves and accept who we are.

What is self-acceptance?

Acceptance allows us to be aware of our strengths and weaknesses and know that they are both okay. Acceptance allows us to exist as we are. The human consciousness has layers of depth to it. Self-acceptance removes the judgement (IE: Strength and Weakness) as we become aware of our fears and desires and allows us to see more clearly and less judgmentally.

When we accept who we are now and not who we think we should be, we allow our thoughts to move to a higher place in self-actualization. Imperfections and mistakes are okay and even empowering. Imagine, the very thing we are criticized for, the feature that is a target for bullying would be our superpower. It is what makes us unique. Someone the world needs RIGHT NOW! This is what happened to me. My “fatness” , something that was at the source of my trauma, ended up being my guiding light.

Our Weakness Becomes Our Strength

Another important truth is that we need self-acceptance in order to become the person we idealize. How can we ever become our Most Beautiful Self if we aren’t accepting who we were, who we are, and who we want to be? How about accepting yourself at this moment? and the next one? and the next one? Become aware. Accept. Continue on.

Let’s hear it from someone else.

Tamara Bong’o says “self-acceptance is an individual’s satisfaction or happiness with oneself” but I disagree. I think self-acceptance carries no emotion, no charge, it just is. The process of life leading up to acceptance can be painful and very emotional but acceptance is actually peaceful. Our minds have been conditioned to glorify the expectations society places on us and the expectations we’ve created for ourselves. I just love hearing how other people’s stories. Does this help you to stop judging yourself and accept who you are?

Our previous lesson on Awareness discovered how faulty expectations cause us to get angry or upset. These expectations society places on us are faulty! They are not the truth of who we are.

Let me tell you this truth.

We do not need any individual or society’s consent on who we are or what we do. We are enough and when we realize this, self-acceptance will grow deeper and we will have more openness to self-expression and creating a life of happiness for ourselves.

When we stop judging ourselves and accepting who we are is also very empowering for others. Our radical self-ownership and willingness to accept ourselves will inspire others to do the same. With acceptance we can break our own barriers and help others break their own limitations too. Be kind to yourself and accept your imperfections, knowing that you are deserving of love and well-being regardless.

Tips on how we can stop judging ourselves and accept who we are:

  • Be grateful – With gratitude we approach new challenges with a clear mind.
  • Love your uniqueness – Your individuality is the flower in the desert.
  • Help others – There is empowerment when you share your gifts.
  • Don’t take criticism personally – Everyone is flawed, the comments are usually a reflection of the person giving them, not on you.
  • Understand your expectations – Find the truth of what is being expected
  • Take inventory of your energetic economy – Your energy has value.
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